More About our Brains

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More About our Brains

I know that it is naïve to think that the boys will be ok with that.  One the flip side though, they will ultimately be better off without me.  The three of them are a great team and instead of being held back because their mom is broken, they should thrive and accomplish many things.

I am disabled.  I CAN’T go to beach.  I can’t sled, I can’t walk, I can’t sleep..  It goes on and on.  My grey matter is disappearing so quickly that by the time I AM 60 I will be shitting myself.  Who would continue to fight a condition that rules your life when the end game is shitting and pissing myself before I am even old.

Husband and children think that I am strong and that I can deal with this.  Thing is, no matter how strong I am, there is nothing I CAN DO to stop the deterioration of my brain.  All my tools that took me years to develop; you know, strategies on how to deal with FMS and all it entails.

I had a decent hold on the thing.  There have been many situations where I can participate because we find something I am able to do.

My own mother..  Instead of showing any remorse or sadness at my fate said she simply doesn’t believe me.  Because the bible told her so.  It will be a while before I speak to her again.

My kids hugged me, everyone else tells me I am full of shit.  Please check below for the articles on this very thing.+

http://www.jneurosci.org/content/27/15/4004.full

http://www.examiner.com/article/brain-grey-matter-atrophy-seen-fibromyalgia

https://www.google.com/search?q=fibromyalgia+grey+matter+loss&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjKwtPp2afKAhXKJR4KHZMyCLoQsAQIPA&biw=1366&bih=643

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About Phoenix Rose

I am a fibromyalgia warrior. I was forced to quit my job, and I spent two years in bed trying to stop my heart with my mind. TWO YEARS. I spend so much time working on this blog because maybe I can prevent just one person from giving up, then I will have considered it a job well done. I am attending university to gain my bachelor's degree in both sociology and psychology. Fibromyalgia is not the end of your life, it is just the end of your life as you know it. Life is still sweet, and we all have something to live for. I am attending University online.. Psychology and Sociology double major. I am not selling a damn thing, I am only writing with raw honesty about this affliction that has forced me to find out just who I am now. Version 2.0 if you will. I know that I went through Marine Corp boot camp and nothing we did there was more difficult than what I now face. I talk about my journey, maybe you read some of my stuff and realize you aren't alone... that is a start. Live, Love, and Fight.

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